Temper Tantrum and Apologies

I have been horrible at keeping up with this blog. I must say that I am not the most computer saavy girl out there, actually I am fairly horrible with the rapidly growing internet world. I don’t have instagram (although all my friends rave about it) I just don’t understand pictures as part of a social network…but maybe that is just the introvert in me rebelling against the lack of privacy that is so obvious to me when it comes to social media. But that is my own opinion and I could go off on that tangent and bore you all with my opinions and obvious lack of social media skills.

I have been neglectful and I apologize. I could rationalize it, justifying my behavior with valid excuses, like how my computer crashed and I lost two finished books that I was about to publish and a handful of half finished stories, but that doesn’t change the fact that I have gone too long without an update.

The month of Febuary was very difficult for me, emotionally. My man was very patient with me and I thank him for that because he didn’t have to be. There is really no reason for my moodiness, at least none that I can pinpoint. Well as with most people in life, there is just only so much a person will take before they have had enough and my man’s fuse was very long before he just blew. I was thoroughly reprimanded, and rightfully. Looking back over the month I can see how inconsiderate, disprespectful, and completely childish I was behaving.

I lost all of my files on my computer and for a few days I wasn’t even quite sure if I would be able to continue using the computer. As a grad student, I live on a very tight budget and a new computer was not possible. So, as the stress compounded I literally sat on the floor and cried, and it wasn’t a cute sweet little show of emotion, it was a loud cry. My man, bless his heart, was so caring and actually paid to have my computer fixed. Although I now had my computer back and working, I still was upset that I lost everything on it. I pouted for weeks like a spoiled child, and although my man was understanding and comforting, I pushed it too far. So that was the straw that broke the camel’s back, or so they say.

I am officially back on track with school (I won’t even go into the dirty details of how horribly behind I got in just a few short weeks!) I am also back to writing. I must say that my man can be very motivating sometimes.

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5 thoughts on “Temper Tantrum and Apologies

  1. Sorry to hear about your computer. That’s terrible.

    This won’t recover what you’ve lost, but to keep yourself safe in the future, I recommend Dropbox. It’s free and stores your files online. So if you lose them, you can just download them again. It’s also great if you want to share files on multiple computers. It syncs them through an Internet connection without needing to transfer anything.

    Anyway, glad to hear you’re still planning to finish the second Maddy story. I’m excited!

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    • Thanks! I will look into dropbox. I definitely need something like that. Losing everything on the computer feels like some one came into my house and stole everything valuable I own lol I feel violated even though it is my own fault! Thanks again!

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  2. I had a hard drive wiped once with 55,000 words on it. The number is engraved in my mind. I find that I can’t go back and rewrite the story after something like that. It just dies.
    Bea

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    • Exactly! It just isn’t the same story and doesn’t have the same rhythm as before. I have never struggled this much with writing a story and I had it already written when I lost it lol. The lost story is on a pedestal that any re-write I try to create can never compare. Very frustrating lol

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